


Dark Paradise

by Aweebwrites



Category: Lego Ninjago
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Tragedy, Angst with a Happy Ending, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Fluff and Angst, Heavy Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-19
Updated: 2019-08-19
Packaged: 2020-08-19 15:57:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20212411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aweebwrites/pseuds/Aweebwrites
Summary: A look into Jay's life after his light left him.





	Dark Paradise

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you @lucariosfish for beta-ing!

"Looks like a storm is heading this way." Kai says, looking out from the deck of the Bounty, spotting the dark clouds heading their way. "Should we find a spot out of its way?" Kai asked, looking across at Nya.

"It's too big of a storm for that. We'd waste fuel. We should find somewhere on the ground to dock so we can ride through it." Nya says as she was watching lightning flash behind the clouds.

"Are you sure?" Lloyd spoke up and they looked at him from where he stood on Nya's other side, Cole beside him.

"Yeah. I mean… It was stormy when it happened. Maybe… We can go around the storm this once? For Jay's sake?" Cole asked quietly, and the siblings shared a look.

Nya sighs.

"Cole, it happened almost 5 months ago." Nya says quietly. "I know it has been tougher on him than us but… He has to get over it eventually. Sooner than later. Lingering on the past like this isn't healthy. Look what it's done to him. It's best he learns to move on. Starting with storms." She told them and they sighed, knowing she was right.

"Yeah… I miss the old Jay. The joker, dorky Jay that took screaming as a sport." Cole says, placing a hand on his jaw.

"The Jay that spoke." Lloyd whispered, then gripped the railing tighty.

"Hey. It wasn't your fault.," Kai says, cutting Lloyd off before he could blame himself. "You did everything you could. We all did." He whispered as Nya placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"If I was faster-"

"Lloyd." Cole says and the teary-eyed blond looked up at the taller ninja. "You did everything you could." He says gently, giving his shoulder a squeeze.

Lloyd sniffled but nodded, brushing his tears away.

"Come on. Let's go dock the ship." Kai says, walking back to the bridge, the others following him.

He did feel a little guilty for what was to come though.

_ 'Sorry Jay. Zane would want you, want us to move on.' _

____________

Thunder rumbled low from the outside, signaling the approaching storm. Jay watched it come from the cabin window, once bright, expressive blue eyes now dull and near lifeless. Out of all places, they chose to dock near the sea. Though he couldn't blame them for that. They didn't know about the morning before he lost it all…

_ "Zane…" Jay whispered with a grin as he slipped off of his own bed and walking across to look at the Nindroid who was asleep. _

_ He smiled softly at him then grinned mischievously. He lifted the sheets up then climbed in, working his way further and further up. By the time his head popper up on the other side, he found amused sky blue eyes on him. _

_ "Good morning, Jay." He says softly, wrapping his arms around his partner's waist and he grinned widely. _

_ "Good morning…" He says, reaching up to prod at his cheek. _

_ The Nindroid chuckled then pressed a soft kiss to the lightning ninja's lips, Jay immediately melting against him. He smiled against his boyfriend's lips. Mornings like this filled his heart with so much love for him and joy. It reminded him of his mission for the day. _

_ "Let's go for a walk before everyone else wakes up." He whispered with a grin and Zane rose a curious brow but was intrigued enough. _

_ "Alright." He agreed and Jay grinned widely. _

The memory already had a ghost of a smile appearing on his face. That morning was the making of the best day of his life.

_ "It's lovely out." Zane comments as they walked along the beach together, hand in hand and Jay nods, a nervous smile on his face. _

_ Oh boy. Could he really do this? What would he say? _

_ "Are you alright?" Zane asked, tugging him to a stop, concern evident on the Nindroid's face. _

_ "Y-yeah! Great! Why do you ask?! Are you fine?! ‘Cuz I am but if you aren't let me know and I'll-" Zane shut up his nervous rambling with a kiss, pulling back a moment after to look down at him with a warm smile. _

_ "Forgive me. You're always so endearing when you're nervous. I couldn't help myself." Zane says and Jay flushed deeply, his freckles disappearing under the intense red of his cheeks. "Talk to me. What's on your mind?" He asked and Jay looked up at his boyfriend, at the softness of his eyes and smile. _

_ He fell in love all over again. His love gave him the strength and courage he needed to finally start talking. _

_ "Well, I had a speech all planned but I forgot it so here I go on the fly." He says with a shaky laugh and Zane's concerned look returned. "Ok. Before I lose confidence, I want you to know that this past year with you have been amazing. Sure it was a little rough at the start after the whole Overlord and Chen thing but it was worth it to get to right where we are, together." Jay told him, giving his titanium hand a squeeze as the Nindroid's worry turned to awe and affection. _

_ "You see, I love you Zane. A whole lot. With my whole heart and everything I have." He says seriously as the Nindroid tried not to cry, even as clear liquid filled his eyes and Jay smiled, feeling his heart swell impossibly more. _

_ It gave him even more courage to… _

_ "In fact, I love you so much, I wanted to ask you…" He pulled out the circular gold, black and white pendant from his pocket as he slipped down to one knee. "Would you be my Yang?" He asked, presenting him with the Yin Yang pendant, a smile on his face as he watched Zane cover his face with both hands, the blue filling his face acting as a clear sign that his internal temperature has risen and his cooling systems have kicked in. _

_ Man he loved him. _

_ "Jay…" The lightning ninja perked up at his name, albeit a bit nervously. _

_ Zane removed his hands looking down at his boyfriend with softly glowing blue cheeks as the lense cleaner his eyes produced ran over, falling down his cheeks. But despite it all, he looked so  _ ** _happy_ ** _ . It made Jay's heart throb, overflowing with love. He had never been certain about anything but this? Them? He was certain that he wouldn't let what they had slip through his fingers. He watched as Zane parted his lips… Then said yes. _

Jay watched as the storm arrived with rain, each drop pelting against the ship like bullets. Zane had kissed him so hard, they were both breathless afterwards. They had never been so happy, wearing their respective pieces. Looking into Zane's eyes as he had then, he knew he wasn't the only one who kept falling in love all over again. They had headed back to tell the others the good news- except they had a mission to attend to. 

Jay slipped out of bed, walking out the door barefoot. He passed by the rest of the team as they all worked together to make a meal, not even batting an eye at them. He walked out on deck, the harsh, icy autumn rain immediately soaking him though. It's been a while since he's been outside. The others don't let him go on missions unless absolutely necessary. Which was fine. He didn't want to do anything. Not without Zane. Shivers traveled up and down his spine as his duller, curly hair flattened, weighed down by the water. Lightning lit up the space around him briefly, allowing him to see just an inch further into the thick fog of rain. He looked towards his left, hearing the sound of the sea over the rain still. Without much thought, he walked in its direction, hopping over the railing to get there. He grunts once he ended up landing on his feet but the impact from the fall had him falling backwards, his back slamming against the ship. His legs gave way and he sat there, trying to recover from his completely spontaneous jump.

He was too cold to feel the pain anyway. He sat there, staring into the fog of night, unflinching against a huge clap of thunder. He got up slowly then walked towards the water, the rain washing the sand off his clothes from the fall but splashed more onto his feet. As he walked aimlessly along the shore, the dreery, cold night flashed in and out, into the soft light of early morning then back to story night as a familiar laugh filled his ears. Jay's tears mixed with the rain as he smiled, Zane’s face haunting him sweetly. That day, he did nothing to help… He… Failed.

_ Their mission was to stop the Chaos Sisters. They were two women who used their smarts to hack into a few of Cyrus' security droids and steal them, all while creating weapons and tools of mass destruction, just for the satisfaction of the chaos it would bring. Knowing just that made Jay want to insist that Zane stay but he knew he wouldn't, knew he would fight with his all. So instead, Jay stuck close to his side, watching his back as Zane returned the favour. The Nindroids that worked for them were easy to take down. They've done worse. They even managed to pull out some witty quips. It was easy… But then it wasn't. _

_ "Lloyd's found them! He needs- ugh! Backup!" Kai yelled as he took down the yellow-eyed Nindroids swarming him. _

_ "Jay and I will back him up, you three handle the Nindroids!" Zane says as they both took off to the main area of their creepy mountain top base, the rain from the storm pelting them immediately, soaking them through. _

_ They both rushed onto the scene to see Lloyd blocking and dodging the laser fire they were putting him under. _

_ "Ninja go!" They both yelled, rushing over with their Spinjitzu to take them down. _

Thunder rumbled over head. It was supposed to be that simple. Take them down, go home and celebrate being engaged. But it hadn't been like that.

Jay gave a soft sigh, his breath coming out as a dull fog between his pale blue lips.

He underestimated them, masters of robotics, next to Borg himself. It was a mistake he paid dearly for.

_ "No! Zane!" Jay yelled once his boyfriend was swept off his feet with a yell, robotic claws holding him up high overhead. _

_ "Let me- go!" Zane yelled, struggling fruitlessly against the limbs holding him up. _

_ "And where's the fun in that?!" The ravenette sister asked, grinning madly as she held a remote controller in hand. _

_ "Unluckily for you, my sister has been dying to try out her latest invention." The formerly unconscious brunette sister says with a smirk, pushing her rain-slicked hair back from her place leaned against a dented piece of machinery. _

_ Jay wasn't listening. His internal alarm bells were going off wildly, sending his heart pounding a mile a minute. _

_ "Don't worry Zane!" Jay yelled out, charging electricity into his palms as he rushed over, ready to short-circuit the claws holding him prisoner. _

_ "No!" He looked over at Lloyd as he yelled, and everything slowed down in those few seconds. _

_ The blacknette was bringing her hand down to push the button as Lloyd rushed to where she was, her sister cackling from the ground. He brought his head back to where Zane was as he ran still, seeing the odd device behind him, pointed at him. He knew in that moment, it was over. That didn't stop him from trying however. He blasted his lightning at the claws desperately, his lightning traveling quickly to their source- but not fast enough. _

_ She pushed the button and the device behind him glowed white. The last thing he saw was Zane's terrified expression before blinding white. He must have screamed since when he could finally see again, his throat felt raw. That wasn't all that felt raw. Coming to a stop and staring up at the space Zane was, he couldn't help but wonder if this was all a vivid dream. Before he could try to consider that he's been sent to another realm possibly, something blue caught his eye. He numbly walked forward, the closer he got, the more the numbness set in. _

_ Because the closer he got, the more evident it became… That the flickering glowing blue object… _

** _Was Zane's core._ **

_ Jay dropped to his knees, his legs too weak to hold him up anymore. He stared at it, as it struggled and flickered… _

** _Before finally going dark._ **

_ He didn't know how long he knelt there, staring at the lifeless core of his boyfriend- of his fiancée -his tears mixing with the rain that drenched him. All he knew was that the others were there, could hear their distress as a distant buzz in his mind. He had shakily reached out, gently taking up the dead core and saw the cracks it now carried. It sunk in then and he shook as he sobs, dissolving further and further into hysteria. He hunched over, ignoring the comforting hands of his friends… _

_ Then screamed up into the storm. _

Jay looked up silently from his place standing still in the storm, the higher tide allowing the warmth of the sea to lick at his feet. The burn of the rain water in his eyes was a welcoming feeling.

After that, he never spoke again. What's the point? Without Zane… He clenched his pale fist as he gritted his teeth.

Without Zane…

What does anything matter?

He looked down, at the salty water pushing its way up on shore and dragging itself back.

The others, they try to help. They do. Their hearts are in the right place but… They don't understand. 

_ "It's time you moved on Jay.” _

_ "This isn't healthy." _

_ "Zane would want you to get better." _

_ "You have to learn to let him go. _

_ "He wouldn't want you to be this way." _

_ "The past is the past, and the future is the future." _

Jay knew Zane wouldn't want him to be this way. But he's also not here. He… Won't ever be. There's no second chance like with the Overlord. This time, he was gone for good. The knowledge keeps him awake more nights than not. They didn't seem to understand that he knows that and he accepts that but that won't make him stop loving Zane. He owns his heart and that will never change. Loving him forever can't be wrong. Even though he isn't here with him anymore, he refuses to move on. There's nothing to move onto. There's nothing else waiting for him.

Waiting… 

He looked ahead again, taking a step forward- only to collapse against the sand with a grunt of pain. He looked back at his throbbing ankle then noticed that it was turning purple as it remained swollen, most likely from the fall. The warm sea water lapping at him made him shiver but briefly.

Sometimes, he ponders the reason he's continuing on. Why bother? More days than not, continuing on didn't seem worth it. But then he'd think of Zane, of how sad he'd be if he'd done anything like that… His eyelids drooped heavily.

Move on. Let go.

He can't.

He doesn't want to.

_ “Jay?!” _

Right now, he just wants to sleep.

He heard multiple footsteps approaching as he drifted off, water lapping at the back of his head.

__________

"Jay."

Huh?

"Come on Jay. Open your eyes…"

That voice… It sounds so familiar…

"For me?"

He fluttered his eyes open, wincing against the bright light of the sky.

"So bright…" Jay groaned and Zane laughed lightly.

"It always is here." He says then helped him sit up.

Jay blinked at Zane as he sat there, smiling patiently at him. His eyes widened before he grasped Zane's cheeks with wide eyes, looking him over.

"Z-Zane?!" He sputtered and the Nindroid smiled.

"Yeah. It's me." He says, reaching up to rest his metallic hands over Jay's.

Tears filled Jay's eyes as he looked at him, looking exactly as he remembered: happy. The tears skipped down his cheeks as reality continued to settle into him.

"You're just a dream, aren't you? I'll wake up again and you'll be gone…" He whispered, voice wavering as he looked away.

"Oh Jay..." Zane whispered softly, reaching out to turn his face to him. "I'm no dream but I won't be there when you wake up." He says, brushing his tears away gently.

"I had asked for the chance to talk to you before you do." He continued softly, Jay sniffling but he was listening. "I would have never left you if I had a choice. I love you more than anything, remember?" He reminded him and Jay found himself nodding as he sat in the middle of the open field of green, golden flowers littered around them.

They've never been here before. This was… Different from his dreams. He could feel it.

"I love you too. More than anything." Jay whispered, shifting to his knees do he could press their foreheads together.

"Oh, I've missed you…" Zane choked out, cupping his cheeks still. "But I don't have much time." He sniffled, tears streaming down his cheeks.

"Why not? Why can't I just stay here with you?" Jay asked softly, brushing his hand against his cheek, his heart warming for the first time in a very long time.

"Jay, you can't. As much as I want us to be us again, you can't." Zane looked up at Jay, wrapping his arms around his waist. "Ninjago needs you, Jay. Our friends do. Your parents do. You have so much more to live for." He whispered and Jay though back to his parents, he recalled visiting once in a while, but not much more.

He's been that out of it... 

"Jay. It may be awhile before we can be together again but that's alright. It'll be worth it. I'll wait for you. Even if you do move on to someone else, I'll-"

"Never." Jay immediately declined. "Never anyone else. I can do anything else but let you go." He declares and Zane smiled, more tears slipping past his cheeks, landing on his yang piece from their engagement.

"Alright," he nods then takes Jay’s hands. "But I need you to do something for me, Jay, before you go back for good." He requested and Jay frowned, even though he was nodding.

"Yeah, of course but can't I stay a little longer? I mean, it's been so long a-and I just got you back and I don't- I can't- I need you to stay! Just for a little while? Please? Zane, I-"

Zane pressing a kiss to his lips, cutting off his panicking rant. He wanted this to last a little longer too but he needed him to keep going...

** _To live._ **

__________

Jay jolted straight up, a cool taste on his lips and a cry of Zane's name on his tongue. He looked around, panting a bit before he slouched, gripping the covers over his lap tightly.

_ Zane… _

The sheets darkened with each drop of his tears that rolled hotly down his pale face, his teeth gritted tightly. Again. Again he lost him. Again he was out of reach. It felt so real, touching him, his lips even felt the same as he remembered… It had to be. He lifted his head, realising something. Lloyd described a place to him once, a place from his dreams. He had no doubt it was the same place he was just at.

_ The Departed Realm.  _

Zane was there. He was happy…

And he was waiting.

Even more tears rolled down Jay's cheeks as he recalled the whole scene, his brief moment with Zane opening his eyes… And reopening his heart. He gave a watery huff of amazement...

But he smiled.

Thank you Zane…

The door to the cabin opened and he looked across to see Cole walking in.

"Oh, you're awake! I knew I heard something." He says with a relieved smile. "We're sorry. We should have tried to get out of the storm's path. We just thought this would be a good time for you to start to move past things and-" Cole shut up realising that he was rambling.

"A-Anyways. How are you feeling?" He asked Jay, noticing his face was still as pale as when they found him in the storm.

He face palms, forgetting Jay was now mute.

"I-"

"Good." Cole did a double take at the quiet, underused voice. "Really good." Jay continues, a smile on his face, completely throwing Cole.

Was he delirious with sickness? Was he the one who was delirious? He hasn't seen Jay smile or even hear him speak since before Zane passed!

"O-oh. That's um… Great! Let me just… Get Sensei real quick." He says then all but dashed out.

Jay huffed then looked up at the roof.

"I'll miss you. That won't change. But I'll keep going for those who need me to… For me." He says softly then smiled. "Hey Zane. Whadoyah say we get married as soon as I get there? When Destiny decides it of course." He asked, fiddling with his half of his pendent around his neck he never took off.

Realms away, Zane smiled, stroking his own half as he looked down into the golden pond, seeing him, hearing him.

"I'd say…" He smiled wider.

** _"I do."_ **


End file.
